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The Finality of Goodbye- Vandalism Publication


The Finality of Goodbye

Brought to his knees,
He slumped,
Sinking lower onto
The overused,
Overturned table.
Gasping for air,
Sobs snuck past his lips.
6’4 reduced
To a wide eyed boy
Clutching
For a hand
Yearning
For a mom’s attention.

She might’ve seen him,
I can’t say for sure.
For her eyes remained shut
And her mouth solemn.
As he waited
Tears spilled slowly
From a grown man’s eye
And a child’s heart.

His counterpart 
Stands at full mast
Stock-still
Stone-faced.
The days of toothy grins
And mock-arm wrestling
Left behind,
Locked away.
His biggest fan
And first coach
Has left him
Without a plan
Or play at hand.

She’s still cheering,
I’m almost certain.
On some days,
If you listen real well
And stay real quiet,
The sounds of her buoyant
Cheers float up
Echoes meeting our ears.

The nightgown
Rests so softly upon
Her brittle collar bone.
The light lilac
Bringing out the skin tone
I’d envied for ages.
So warm, freckled,
Sun-filled,
So many hot afternoons at the ballpark.

Breaking through the barrier
I cross the threshold,
Covering the floor between
Me and her.
A regular exchange
I’d done so many times
As I left
For the night
For school
For work
A simple see you later.

I stiffly ease into the area .
Mechanically, I look down.
Peace.
My mind at war with my body.
I reach for her.
Lips pressing upon her icy cheek,
Choked, cold,
Foreign.

This is new.

Goodbye, mom.

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